Looking back

Since July 2018 I have been following the Visionary Communication pathway. In Toastmasters (a public speaking and leadership group). It is a curriculum of speeches and projects. The pathway culminates in the development and launch of a long-term personal or professional vision. In my case, it was the launching of my own website and blog.   

I was taking the time to look back over what I have learned during this period. Before I get into it, I would first like to tell you a story.   

It starts with a cottage. An old stone English cottage in the countryside. It is a hot summers day. You can smell the sweet roses in the garden.   

A white horse clip-clops through the garden being led by a hooded figure. The hooded figure can feel the horses hot breath and sweat in the air. The hooded figure turns and has s skeletal face. It is death and his horse Binky.   

Death leads the horse round to the stables at the back of the cottage. At the stables, Mr Miyagi and Daniel-san are painting the stable walls. Up, Down. Up, down. Daniel-san gets frustrated. Daniel-san throws the paintbrush in anger. The paintbrush knocks a comic out of the hands of a small boy sat on a garden bench.   

The pages the boy was reading are covered in wet brown paint. He picks up the comic off the floor and shakes his head. On the front of the comic is a full-page picture of Optimus Prime, the leader of the Autobots from the Transformers.   

The little boy is splattered with paint from the brush. He takes himself into the cottage to get cleaned up. On the way in, he throws the comic on to an old wooden writing desk in the study. It has a sloped lid and is full of fountain pens and ink wells. The desk sits under a sash window overlooking the back garden.   

This story provides a way to remember the five important parts of my pathways journey. The cottage, death, Mr Miyagi, Optimus Prime and the writing desk.   

Cottage   

This symbolises my home life. When I delivered my icebreaker, it allowed me to revisit my childhood and my family. My mum, my dad and my sister Julie. What was I good at and what did I enjoy at school. Art, science and maths. I had forgotten that I wanted to be a scientist when I grew up.   

It made me think of what kind of dad and husband I am. Encouraging my kids at school. Teaching them at home myself when they are struggling. Spending my weekends taking them to swimming lessons, Jiu-Jitsu and football lessons. Getting home on time so my wife can go for a run. Eating the same slimming world meals as my wife to help her keep a healthy diet.   

Also what kind of dad and husband I want to be in the future. Wanting to be there when my kids got home from school so I can take them to the park or classes during the week. Being able to spend more time with my wife, maybe going for a meal or dancing lessons.   

Death   

This symbolises the shortness of life. There is the funeral exercise in Steven Covey’s book ‘The seven habits of highly effective people’. The fact I have reflected on my death. I have envisioned my funeral. I have written my eulogy. That I delivered my own eulogy 3 or 4 times within Toastmasters meetings. That at the end I would want to see hundreds or thousands of people I have helped during my life. Either through martial arts, toastmasters, writing, leadership or coaching.   

Mr Miyagi   

This symbolises mentoring. Initially thinking I had managed to get where I am in life all by myself. It seems I didn’t. I had help along the way. I delivered a speech about my martial arts mentor. How he has opened my eyes to other possibilities. Helped me see things I could see by myself. He asked me difficult questions. Helped me think things through for myself. This helped me grow and moved forward. I also realised that I could do the same for others.   

Optimus Prime comic   

This symbolises leadership. When I started my Visionary Communication pathway, I also started as President of Leeds City Toastmasters. I never wanted to lead. I would happily be second in command and provide advice. I would happily just sit on the committee and help the club run. But when my friend Simon stepped down as President, it felt right to step up and do my term.  

I have enjoyed leading. I have reflected on what leadership means to me. Learning to fill the gap, leading from the front and being able to help others get where they need to go. Realising that I can’t head forever and others will need to lead too. Then realising I can encourage overs to lead to.   

Writing desk   

This symbolises my writing. This was my ultimate goal. To set up a website and blog, To build a writing habit. More importantly, to publish my writing to the world. The plan was to write and publish one article a week for a year, then see where life takes me. Since May 2019 I have published 34 articles and written over 44,000 words. On LinkedIn, two articles have over 300 views and a further two over 400 views.   

The writing has allowed me to discover what I want to write about. Helped me to research topics I care about. How it may help others on their journey.   

Summary   

Initially, I started this pathway to give me a deadline in setting up a website and a blog.   

Along the 18 month journey, I have learnt so much since then. What type of father and husband do I want to be. What type of life I want to live. The benefit of mentoring. The impact of good leadership. The lessons to be learnt from writing.   

The hard task is to decide which path to follow now. What is the next goal?   

Personally, I think I need to either follow a leadership pathway or a coaching pathway. But I have a little time to reflect on that.   

You may have started on a pathway with a set goal. But keep your eyes and ears open. There are all sorts of lessons to be learned on this journey. You never know where they will come from.