If you want to lead, you need to learn to fill the gap

I have mentioned before that I am a member of Toastmasters International. An organisation designed to build public speaking, leadership and communication skills. The organisation has over 358,000 members in over 16,800 clubs in 143 countries around the world. 

Each club has a committee who help run the club. Each committee is made up of the following roles:

President

Vice President of Education 

Vice President of Membership 

Vice President of Public Relations 

Treasurer 

Secretary 

Sergeant of Arms. 

Taking on these roles voluntary. No one is forced to take on the role (although there may be some persuasion from others). They receive no money. In fact, they keep paying their membership fees like any other member. But they do offer their spare time to fulfil the role. They offer it freely and willingly. 

I currently serve as President of my Toastmasters club. 

I do so willingly and freely. 

Why? 

To grow and to give.  

To use the opportunities that will come to me to do things I have never done before. To experience things, I wouldn’t experience otherwise. To grow.

To be in a position of influence, so that I may help others within the community. To provide opportunities to others. To provide experiences to others that they may not experience otherwise. To give.

What have I learned so far, during my term of office? 

Filling the gap 

What is polyfiller? 

It is a material used to fill holes, to fill gaps. This is the skill I have learned whilst being President. 

One meeting, all the speakers dropped out a day or two before the meeting. With 24 hours notice, I decided to fill the gap and deliver a speech and organise an educational. It may not have been my finest speech, but I made sure the meeting ran and with something worthwhile for the audience.

Toastmasters holds four competitions every year. Table Topics (impromptu speaking), Humorous Speech, Evaluation and the International Speech Competition. All the competitions start off in the club. The winners go to the Area competition. Then the Division, then the District, then possibly the World Conference. Last year no-one in the club wanted to compete. Myself and a couple of other members filled the gap. Others were happy to run the competition but nobody wanted to compete. This year it has been the other way round. People were happy to compete but nobody wanted to run the meeting. So I filled the gap. I ran the competition. 

It’s a gift 

When you learn to fill the gaps, it can be easy to fall into the trap of always filling the gaps. It becomes a habit. 

While I can fill all the gaps I can. I can’t fill them all. If I did, it would be one of those movies where I play all the parts. And that type of club would be no fun. 

You realise being able to fill the gaps is a fantastic skill to have. It is also a gift. A gift you can give to others.  

I am not going to be President forever. I am going to have to step down and allow someone else to lead. Sometimes they can end up better than you.

A few months back, a speaker didn’t turn up to a meeting. My fellow member Simon Day delivered a speech with 15 minutes notice. I thought delivering a speech with 24 hours notice was pretty awesome. Damn you, Mr Day!  

But it is fantastic to see others fill the gap and fill the gap better than you.  

I mentioned competing in last years toastmasters speaking competitions when no-one else would. Filling the gap. My friend Simon Day also chose to fill the gap. We went head to head in the competitions. Both getting to the next round and competing in the area competition. I didn’t win and bowed out of the competition. Simon won, however. He kept going. He actually went on to become UK and Ireland Champion of the Toastmasters Evaluation competition.  

Something that may not have happened unless he was willing to fill the gap. 

Courage 

Filling the gap is not easy and you will feel resistance and fear doing it. To face that fear you will need to find courage.  

A few months back we held the division competition on home ground, at my own club venue. I offered to fill the gap and to be competition chair for the Evaluation competition. I attended a normal club meeting in the same room two nights before. At that meeting, I was toastmaster, a speaker and an evaluator and I felt fine. Chairing a competition in the same room but with different faces scared me. I have not been that scared in a long time. I have made an effort to wear a waistcoat tie and jacket. When I got home I was sporting some very large sweat patches in my waistcoat. 

If you want to give others, the opportunity to fill the gap, you will need to help them find the courage. You will need to encourage them. An opportunity just difficult enough for them to feel resistant. But something not too difficult that they feel completely out of their depth. 

I often email the club members to put them forward for a meeting role. It’s my way of encouraging them to fill the gap. To do something that will help them grow and to make the meeting run. The get the most of their time at Toastmasters. 

Praise 

Remember, filling the gap is scary and takes courage. To make filling the gap a positive experience, you need to take the time to praise yourself. 

I requested feedback recently from my club members about how I was doing as President. The main point for improvement was about praising others. Praising the committee and the club members. They did acknowledge that I do praise, just that, they thought I had the potential to do a better job. 

I think I struggle because I don’t praise myself. Whenever I complete a task or achieve a goal, I am straight into the next one. I never seem to stop and celebrate. To resolve this I have started a praise journal. At the end of each day, I am to write at least 5 things I should praise myself for. Then I write praise for each of my kids and my wife. Then praise for my friends and colleagues. Similar to a gratitude journal.  

I hope this will help improve my ability to praise. 

Takeaways 

My favourite definition of leadership is a quote by Rosalynn Carter: 

“A good leader takes people where they want to go, a great leader takes people where they don’t want to go, but need to be” 

If you want to lead, you need to learn to fill the gap. To learn to make sure things run. That the group achieves its objective. 

Remember to will not be able to lead forever and at some point, someone else is going to have to take over. Learn to pass on the gift of filling the gap. 

Filling the gap takes courage. Learn to face fear and encourage others to do the same. 

When you or others fill the gap, then praise. Praise yourself. Praise others. 

Footnotes 

A club does not stand or fall due to one member. It is a community. And we all have to take it in turns to lead. We all have to learn to fill the gap.  

We are all leaders in training. When the opportunity arises, will you stand up and lead?